3 Things that should never control you

Life is a code we write to suit what we want in life. We have different stages in life. Three things are very pertinent to our life. Three things that always want to control us. As we journey through life, there are things that should never take hold of us at any point in time. These things would always try their best to get the best of us but at no time should we give them the opportunity to do so.  

When you are trying to make headway, there are things, people, that would always want to have a hand in your story. The truth is that, some of these people that want to be a part of your story do so because they are happy for you, don’t be surprised some also want it so they would be able to say they helped you to the top or you are nothing without them.

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Quickly, we will study 3 things that would be part of your life, but should never control you in life;

#1 Past

‘In other words, it is quite true that the past haunts us; it is the past's function to haunt us who are present and wish to live in the world as it really is, that is, become what it is now’ - Hannah Arendt. One of the things that always want to have a share or a part in our life and most times want to slow down our movement or push us back is our past. This becomes worse went the past is one full of sorrow and shame, one which our errors and mistakes were the one that caused the setback. Our past always want to eat into our present and also dictate what will still happen to us (future).

Bad past tries to haunt us and want us to make similar mistakes. Such example is Barca winning first leg against Roma in the Champions League and losing the second leg with a big margin. Such happened again in the following year when they won Liverpool in the first leg and lost the second leg with a great margin. It was obvious in the match when Barca conceded the first and second goal and was scared of losing again. This was one of the major factors that made Barca lose the match. 

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The past would want to eat into your present and make similar mistake, this is what causes repeated failures. It is sometimes difficult to let the past go, especially when it comes to business failure, relationship, family, but it still remains that, ‘The past must not control us’. ‘It is extremely important that you show some insensitivity to your past in order to show the proper respect for the future’ - Roberto Goizueta.

#2 Money

‘The more money you have, the more problems you have. I went from having no money to making comparatively a lot and all I've had is problems. Life was simpler when I had no money, when I just barely survived’ – Madonna. Money is one of the necessities of life. Life without money is many times boring, unfulfilled and unsatisfactory. No matter the evils money brings to the society; it is still what we always want to covet. 

You can actually hate having money, but you will never love not having it. However, money is still one of the fastest means to poverty. Well, if you read this article, Eating my Prime Seed, the picture is well painted on how excess money can send you into poverty when you didn’t use it properly.

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‘Money and time are the heaviest burdens of life, and...the unhappiest of all mortals are those who have more of either than they know how to use’ - Samuel Johnson. Money becomes excess when you get more than you worked for. This can come as gifts or inheritance, just because they came freely and you never planned for it or you got them dubiously, you start to spend it anyhow.  

You buy things you need and don’t need, you accumulate liabilities instead of assets, you profligate it instead of investing it, whether you like it or not, money is already controlling you. The moment you think you have too much money, that moment money starts controlling you.

‘The surest way to ruin a man who doesn't know how to handle money is to give him some.’ - George Bernard Shaw. Don’t let money order you around, it should be the other way round. Wealth test people’s ability to handle it, before deciding if it will stay with them or not. The moment wealth sees you can’t handle her or you are carried away by the euphoria of having her around, it leaves you. Never think one can’t move from riches to poverty, it is very possible.

See also:
The things I did wrong
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10 things you must lose to move forward

#3 People

‘If by the people you understand the multitude, the hoi polloi, 'tis no matter what they think; they are sometimes in the right, sometimes in the wrong; their judgment is a mere lottery’ - John Dryden. Exactly, people’s opinion about you is only a mere conclusion they made about the 5% they know about you, forgetting that the remaining 95% is more important and decisive. It would be a great disservice to your life when you allow people that are not up to you or people that envy your success to decide your fate or what your life would look like.

Have you asked yourself why the opinion of these people have not made them better than who they were yesterday, so why should they turn your own life to a lab-rat that they use for different experiments. The road on life journey is rough, and people try to get at you anytime just to slow you down or drag you down to their level. 

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The moments you concentrate on the noise of the market instead of facing the one you doing business with, then you have allowed them to get at you. Always try to ignore or close your ears and heart to negative comments or opinion about you. Let their discouraging words only ginger you to work harder and not to hinder you from achieving success.

See also: 
Steve Jobs: A Successful drop-out
Thomas Sankara: An African Revolutionary
Carl Brashear: Never give up on your dreams
Jerry Rawlings: The man that changed Ghana
Lee Yuan Kew: Started like Nigeria, ended like Singapore

You are responsible for your own life and nobody else. The result of your life is what you gave it to be. Never let anybody throw you down with their words. The most painful words come from close and loved ones, wife, husband, child, parent, boss, lover and the likes, they are difficult to let go, but if you want to actually progress in life, you have to let go. ‘People are the mud that sticks the tyre on a spot in the journey of life’.

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