5 Ways to Boost your Self-confidence

According to Beatrice Webb, ‘If I ever felt inclined to be timid as I was going into a room full of people, I would say to myself, 'You're the cleverest member of one of the cleverest families in the cleverest class of the cleverest nation in the world, why should you be frightened?'. While you are fighting and dragging on life’s journey and how to be a success, one of the most important equipment, ingredient and armor you must go with is self-confidence. This is also explained in the article The 3 Power Packs of Life.

You might have a lot in your head, I mean you might have a lot to offer, you might be able to do a lot of things, you might have a lot of skills and you might be fastest in completing a task, but when you lack self-confidence in expressing yourself, all your skills and talents might just be a mirage. They might just remain there wasting away because the confidence you ought to have to introduce them to the outside world or give you an opportunity to showcase them is lacking in you.

You then start to say, it is because they do not know me, it is because they have never seen me do such a thing before, however, they gave you an opportunity to express yourself and tell them what you can do. The cases are rare where you showcase your talents before you tell them what you can do. What occurs frequently is expressing yourself, convincing your listeners, answering questions from panels to be offered a job, admission or opportunity. You might truly be perfect in that skill, but when you can’t express yourself or confident enough to say what you can do, then you lose such a prestigious opportunity again.

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If you can read carefully, follow this article to the latter and make use of the recommendations, then I believe you will be able to conquer that hydra-headed monster in a short time. So, what are the things you should know or follow in order to increase your self-confidence;

#1 Stop comparing yourself; stay focused on you

According to Alan Bristow, ‘I believe in industry. I believe in the Queen. I believe in God. But most of all, I believe in myself’. Always have this truth at the back of your mind; you are the only person of your type created or existing in this world. I mean, we have only your type that exists in this world. That is why your iris or your finger print can’t match that of another person no matter how related you are. Imagine if we have just one cockroach, despite the organism not a friend of so many, the world has to keep it carefully so it doesn’t go extinct. That is just how much you have to value yourself.

Never in your life compare yourself with others, there can be one who eats like you but doesn’t walk like you, one can be smart like you but not hardworking like you, big like you but not aggressive like you. Therefore, value yourself more than someone else. Always see yourself every day; we have just one of you and it should be well taken care of. Never underestimate yourself, some peoples life might be running and you think they are doing better than you, you need not worry, it is their own time to do well. 

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When it is time for you to do well, then you will do well. Therefore, stay focused on yourself alone, our life’s exam papers are actually different; it is not how far, but how well. And it is not about the distance covered, it is about how well you are doing with the little you have covered.

#2 Relax, go with the flow, don’t force yourself to achieve or impress

Alfred P. Sloan says, ‘Take my assets—but leave my organization and in five years I'll have it all back’. In life, you don’t have to force anything or try to impress anyone. Always work hard but don’t try to impress. Most people that got it wrong on their confidence by being over-confident actually look stupid after it. Immediately you see someone bragging and trying to impress, you know they just want to force their success on you. They are just trying to make you believe what doesn’t exist. Never try to brag or impress anyone. 

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Always go with the flow. If possible, always hide who you are. When people know you too much, they start to dig out the dirty things about you. If possible, be so humble and unpredictable. Let people have doubts about your worth and who you are. Whenever you get to a new environment, hide yourself for a while and study the environment. When you open your mouth and you start to talk the first time you get to a place, it is from that day people start to know you. Even the bible says, ‘if a fool closes his mouth, people will think he is wise’.

When you remain calm, your self-confidence gathers itself. When people ask you to talk, because you have taken your time to say what is in your mind, you have thought so well and decided on what is best to say, you will be well respected with what is coming from your mouth. Always plan what you want to say. Learn to think before you talk. Make sure, you do not answer the questions you are not asked.

#3 Love yourself, you are a gift, if you die today, life will still go on

According to Ellen Swallow Richards, ‘If you keep your feathers well-oiled, the water of criticism will run off as from a duck's back’. One thing you should know about life is that you can never satisfy everyone. Love yourself, I mean, satisfy yourself before you think of satisfying someone else. There is no amount of good you can do to a man that wants to hate you; he will still hate you anyway. Great men have died in the past; we have greater and more important people than you in the society , after they left the world, days were declared to mourn them, flags were flew at half mast, still, you will think the world will seize because of their departure, however, nothing seized, life keeps making sense. 

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How much more you that is not known past your neighborhood. Nobody lives for anybody, always keep your head high in all situation; you can’t just satisfy everybody. Always know that your presence is only important to people because you are around, the moment you leave, that is the moment they forget you, they might feel sad for few days, but they will always get over it just like how you got over the death of close friends and relatives. Never try to live for anybody.

#4 Be Positive and look for the good in every situation

According to John Foster Dulles, ‘Yes, once—many, many years ago. I thought I had made a wrong decision. Of course, it turned out that I had been right all along. But I was wrong to have thought that I was wrong’. Nothing is guaranteed in this life. We all make decisions even when the future is not clear to us; the best thing to do is to be optimistic in such situations. If it works out, then it is good, if it doesn’t work out, it becomes experience; a mistake you can never repeat. Always see the silver lining in the dull cloud, see the light at the end of the tunnel, and always see the positive side of every bad situation.

Most times, we pass through problems to build us up, to make us strong and to prepare us. If gold never passed through fire, it can’t be as beautiful as it is. If iron never passed through fire, it can’t be melted to desired shape and it won’t be found in palaces. Things don’t happen for happening sake, they happen all for a reason. Always see a reason why things happen. That is not the time to blame anyone, it is not the time to say ‘Why me’, it is not the time to be moody or feel bad, it is the time to look back if the mistakes are yours, learn and correct yourself. Pick up yourself and face front. Where you are going is more important than where you are coming from.

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The goodness ahead will still overshadow the pains of today. If you are not trained, developed and prepared for the success ahead, you won’t be able to manage the success that is to come. Grow back your confidence and know there is a reason for everything.

#5 Do what you love; Life is too short to waste your time on what don’t matter

Beryl Markham says, ‘Success breeds Confidence’. The only way you can convince your haters is to be successful. The best revenge you can have for the people that offended you is to be successful in your endeavors. The outcome of your efforts is more important than your opinion in a matter. Actions speak louder than words. You are not working hard to be successful and to impress your haters, No! You are only working hard to be successful to make yourself happy and show them that you can actually live without them. Ignoring people is more painful than responding to them.

Always make sure whatever you are doing at every point in time is productive. Don’t waste your limited energy on what doesn’t matter and what doesn’t count. Always put your time in what will take you higher, always spend your time with people that matter, avoid negative people who could drag you down or back. They don’t do good and still won’t be happy to see somebody else do something good; avoid them with all your strength. Whatever you do that doesn’t add to your progress in life, please ignore them. Life is too short to joke with it. Do your best as much as you can and see how your success will be re-sounding. Success will bring out the confidence people thought you never had.

We hope you have learnt one or two things, please don’t forget to share with friend. You can also drop your comment, and if you have any question, suggestion or recommendation, please do not hesitate to contact us.